Indenar Noldo v. Thomas Nook

Indenar Noldo v. Thomas Nook is a John Kirby Court case in which Indenar Noldo IV did his utmost to break past the defenses of defendant Defragon Peroxus Caesium and sue Thomas Nook. Serving on the jury were Asriel Dreemurr-Motorola Caesium and LEGO Temmie, with Mr. NotJohnKirbo as judge. The case began on June 23, 2020 CE and ended in stalemate on June 24, continuing under the name Indenar Noldo v. Thomas Nook: The Second Part.

Transcript of pretrial preparations, June 23, 2020 CE

Time (PM UTC-4)	Speaker	Words
06:51	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	ATTENTION! AT APPROXIMATELY 9:30 THE TRIAL OF MR. TOM NOOK WILL BEGIN! SERVING AS THE DEFENDANT WILL BE [DEFRAGON PEROXUS CAESIUM], AND THE CONVICTION WILL BE [INDENAR NOLDO]! THE RESULTS WILL BE DETERMINED BY BURNOUT UNLESS SOMEONE SIGNS UP TO BE JUDGE. YOU CANNOT BE JUDGE IF YOU ALREADY HAVE A ROLE. ANYONE WHO WISHES TO BE ON THE JURY PLEASE SIGN UP BELOW BEFORE 9:15. DEFENDANT, WILL YOU BE ABLE TO ATTEND?
06:51	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Yes sir, creepy narrator!
06:52	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	CONVICTANT, WILL YOU BE ABLE TO ATTEND?
06:54	Indenar Noldo	Oh, I remember this chat! When's the trial? "John Kirby Court", I'm lovin' it.
08:01	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	THE TRIAL STARTS AT 9:30 SO FAR, ONLY ASRIEL DREEMURR HAS SIGNED UP FOR JURY DUTY PLEASE SIGN UP BELOW
09:01	Indenar Noldo	Yes sir, creepy narrator! I, Indenar Noldo, will be convictant! And while Asriel's a very swell and wonderful guy, he also lives inside [Defragon]'s home and may be variably impartial, so I'd like to submit a jury guy of my own! That would be Tablecloth! One moment. Awkwardly enough, Tablecloth told me that "[he] refuse[s] to help [me] in [my] idiotic scheme to sue someone just for personal saltiness and publicity." Even if I have very good reasons for suing Nook. So I'll review my list of available judge people. While I'd get Mettaton to help, I don't want to drag him into this. So instead, I propose my sister [Horticulture]'s new happily fambily. LEGO Temmie!
09:02	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	LEGO tm TEMMIE, DO YOU ACCEPT THIS HONOR?
09:02	LEGO Temmie	hOI! i'm teMMIE!!!!!!!!1!!!1 i will bE grEAT JUDGE!!!!!!!!! yAyA!1!!!!!!!! tEMMie wenT 2 COlleg!!!!!!!!!!
09:02	Indenar Noldo	That would be her. She seems to accept!
09:05	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	ANYONE ELSE? NONPARTISAN PLEASE LAST CALL AT 9:15 AND WE DON'T HAVE A JUDGE
09:05	Indenar Noldo	True. We need a third member of the jury.
09:05	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	SO UNLESS ONE SIGNS UP, OH WAIT I'M THE JUDGE.
09:05	Indenar Noldo	One that is not clearly affiliated with [Defragon], Asriel, LEGO Temmie, or me.
09:05	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	SORRY EVERYBODY!
09:06	Indenar Noldo	Oh. That's okay, creepy narrator! Wait, are you John Kirby?
09:06	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NO...?
09:06	Indenar Noldo	THE John Joseph Kirby Jr.?
09:06	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	JOHN KIRBY IS DEAD
09:07	Indenar Noldo	The one who saved Nintendo in Universal City Studios, Inc. v. Nintendo Co., Ltd., got exclusive worldwide rights to use the name "Donkey Kong" for sailboats from Nintendo, had Kirby named after him, and then DIED? THAT John Kirby?
09:07	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	... NO WE HAVE PEOPLE SIGNED UP
09:07	Indenar Noldo	Well, what is your name?
09:08	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	A REPRESENTATION OF YOUTUBERS! DOUG DOUH
09:08	Indenar Noldo	Is it "Not John Kirby"? "Jack Dedede"?
09:11	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	DESBUG AND ALPHARAD HAVE SIGNED UP TODAY! IT'S NOT ACTUALLY THEM, JUST REPRESENTATIONS OF THEM! NOW BEFORE 9:30 I WILL GO OVER THE RULES. 1) THE DEFENDANT AND THE PROSECUTOR WILL DEBATE THE SITUATION. THE ONE WHO CAN ARGUE THE OTHER INTO A STANDSTILL WILL BE THE WINNER! THIS MEANS THAT VICTORY IS A MUTUAL DECISION! 2) ANYTHING GOES! MATH, GIMMICKS, WITNESSES BAD JOKES ABOUT SKELETONS WHATEVER YOU FEEL YOU NEED TO DEFEND/PROSECUTE TOM NOOK! 3) YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ASK ANY QUESTIONS OF TOM NOOK! THIS IS THE ONLY EXCEPTION TO THE RULE ABOVE!
09:12	Indenar Noldo	What do you mean, "QUESTIONS OF TOM NOOK"?
09:13	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	4) THE JURY CAN INTERRUPT AT ANY TIME! OH, YOU DON'T KNOW? TOM NOOK WILL BE ATTENDING HIS TRIAL!
09:13	Indenar Noldo	Oh, wonderful.
09:13	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	YOU MAY NOT INTERACT WITH HIM AT ALL, NOR HIM YOU.
09:15	Indenar Noldo	Any other rules?
09:16	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	5) IF SOMETHING HAPPENS THAT I DECIDE IS AGAINST THE RULES I MAY SAY SO AT ANY TIME DURING COURT! CALL ME OUT IF YOU BELIEVE MY RULES ARE UNFAIR!

Transcript of Trial Day 1, June 23, 2020 CE

Time (PM UTC-4)	Speaker	Words
09:33	Indenar Noldo	Hey Not-John Kirby, are you ready? It's 9:33.
09:36	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	WE WILL BEGIN NOW. WE TOOK THIS 5 MINUTES TO ASSURE THAT EVERYBODY CAN ARRIVE.
09:36	Indenar Noldo	Spectacular!
09:38	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	NOW THAT WE ARE ALL HERE, IT'S TIME TO BEGIN! FIRST TO THE JUDGE FOR THE OPENING STATEMENT! ... crap, I'm the judge
09:38	Indenar Noldo	What a touching statement, Mr. Not John Kirby!
09:40	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	WELL Uh I'LL MAKE THE STATEMENT THEN! TODAY WE ARE HERE TO WITNESS THE TRIAL OG TOM NOOK BEFORE THIS LAWFUL COURT. IS HE A GOOD MAN? IS HE A BAD ONE? AND WILL BE GET A SENTANCE? TODAY'S THE DAY WE FIND OUT. NOW, REPRESENTING THE PROSECUTION, MAY I PLEASE INTRODUCE THE HONORABLE INDENAR NOLDO.
09:40	Indenar Noldo	Hello there!
09:41	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	MR. NOLDO, PLEASE SAY A FEW WORDS.
09:42	Indenar Noldo	Thomas Nook. I have seen him as a parasite who feeds on my island and the people who live on it. But perhaps today is the day I change my mind. And instead see him as an irredeemable demon.
09:43	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	THANK YOU FOR THOSE ENLIGHTENING WORDS.
09:43	Indenar Noldo	You're welcome!
09:44	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	NOW, REPRESENTING THE DEFENSE, THE PERSON WHO I'M NOT SURE IS LEGALLY ABLE TO ATTEND COURT BECAUSE HE'S LEGALLY DEAD IN ANOTHER DIMENSION, CAISIUM (I don't know his last name. Shoot. I'll just give him one) NASA!
09:45	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Thank you Mr. NotJohnKirbo.
09:45	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	PLEASE GIVE YOUR OPENING STATEMENT!
09:45	Indenar Noldo	His Ilvandorian legal name is actually "Defragon Peroxus Caesium".
09:48	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Defragon Peroxus Caisium. That works. Well then. Today we're going to relearn something we all knew this whole time: that Tom nook is a good man. A great one even. There's so much evidence against him being evil that I don't even feel like I need to be in court today. But if I must sit here and prove something that we all know to be true, then do it I will for the sake of our Racoon buddy.
09:49	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	WOW, THIS IS THE MOST AGGRESSIVE DEBATERS WE'VE EVER HAD! THIS WILL PROBABLY BE MORE TOXIC THEN WHEN THESE TWO PLAY MARIO MAKER!
09:49	Indenar Noldo	If that's the case, this ought to be fun. Bring it on.
09:50	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	YOU SEEM VERY EAGER, MR. NOLDO. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BEGIN?
10:08	Indenar Noldo	Thomas "Tom" Nook. At first, I thought that he was, in the words of my mother's mother's sister's sister's daughter's son's friend, "a good man". But then, I learned the truth about him. Slowly but surely. He once gave me my very own NookPhone. He made a joke. He said that it was easier to use than most other phones because it had less features. He laughed at this. I shrugged this off as a strange sense of humor; after all, if someone wants to find the fact that their telephone model is inferior to others on the marker hilarious, who am I to judge? Through this NookPhone, he gave me free Nook Miles for literally anything I did, really. How nice. Except he constantly referred to himself as "generous" for this. Even though Nook Miles are not a real currency. Later, though, he issued an option to redeem Nook Miles for real currency (Bells). I was elated. Perhaps Nook was a good person. Oh, how wrong I was. Nook. He gives me free Nook Miles for everything. Chopping down trees, growing trees, harvesting rocks, learning about fossils, talking to my friends, and changing. CHANGING. Nook regularly SPIES on me while I am CHANGING, to the extent that I haven't played Animal Crossing: New Horizons in weeks out of fear that he will find new ways to invade my privacy. Sure, he gives me free money for changing. So? Would you accept a man's perverted voyeurism and stalking just because he paid you money for it? Even after you've wanted to explain to him that you're not okay with this for quite a while. But New Horizons controls what I can say to Nook. And somehow, I know that this is Nook's design. Nook was created by Nintendo, who made New Horizons. This island, Almîland, of which I am Resident Representative, is under Nook's and Nintendo's joint jurisdiction. Everyone respects Nook as the "fearless leader" of this "operation". Exact quotes, from people on Almîland. But my family members moved to Almîland. Every. Single. Time they did this, Nook told them that there had been an unfortunate mix-up and Nook Inc. had been unable to provide them with a home. They would have to do it yourself. But hey! That's okay, it fits the "deserted island" theme! What a pathetic joke. EVERY TIME. One time I could forgive, but EVERY TIME. I realized that Nook didn't care about whether or not my family had places to stay or live. He just wanted to make sure he could justify it with an excuse. And not just my family. An unfortunate mix-up happened three more times when villagers sought to move to Almîland. I was forced to provide not just the locations for their homes, but all their furniture too! It cost plenty of resources and time to make me question "WHY"? Why was I doing all the chores of a tyrant with stalkerish tendencies? Because no matter how many days, weeks, months, or years I waited, I KNEW that Nook would never step up to the task and Do It Himself. And that's not taking into consideration his children, or however Timmy and Tommy Nook are related to the man. Timmy and Tommy sell seemingly infinite resources and have astonishingly deep wallets. Is it legal to hire them? Is it legal or ethical to allow this man, who has been known to spy on people in their homes as they change, to hire children seemingly under their own legal protection, to manage his company? Simply because he is more willing to spy on people like me at all hours of the day than manage his own finances? That's not all; aside from the fashion store and occasional travelling merchant, Nook has a monopoly on precious resources. Access off the island he controls, knowledge of how to create useful tools, and other gizmos. By gizmos, I mean EVERYTHING ELSE ON THIS BLASTED ISLAND THAT IS CONSISTENTLY AVAILABLE FROM THE ISLAND AND NOT FASHION. I think that's everything, Judge, what's next? Thanks for letting me get that off my metaphorical chest and literal hands.
10:09	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	THAT WAS VERY IMPRESSIVE! NOW MAY THE DEFENSE MAKE IT'S RESPONSE?
10:10	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	First off I'd like to congratulate my good friend Mr. Noldo here for putting up a very impressive fight.
10:10	Indenar Noldo	Why thank you!
10:11	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	You're very welcome. In fact, I will reward you be disproving every single point you just made one by one. Does that sound good?
10:11	Indenar Noldo	Sure!
10:13	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Well let's begin with the NookPhone. Now you're right that it's not a great sign when the guy providing you with everything you need jokes about not having a fully functional phone. But what if he did the best he could and he's just trying to laugh it off with good old humor? Now, I have a phone. I'm using one right now. And my phone is very old.
10:13	Indenar Noldo	Hey Judge, is it legal to respond to things other people say or should I wait for him to finish?
10:13	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	It does not have as many features as most of the phone's other people I know have.
10:14	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	WAIT UNTIL HE'S DONE. YOU'RE TAKING TURNS, REMEMBER?
10:14	Indenar Noldo	He waited for me, but I'm wondering if that's a matter of preference, or... y'know what, I'll just wait. Please go on, [Defragon]. Cool! Please continue.
10:31	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	So I'd like to stress that in my experience, not having a lot of features isn't a very bad thing at all. The phone does it's job and more. See, most modern phone's come with a SIM card. This gives you a basic WiFi connection when you're offline. And it costs a lot of money to use. But, with the NookPhone, You can use it's WiFi, basic as it looks, at a decent speed, on a once deserted island. And you don't have to pay one bell for a service that could have costed nook thousands. So it doesn't matter if the phone doesn't have a lot of features. Tom decided to focus on improving your use experience to something that you'd know on the mainland, even though you're on a deserted island. Plus, the fact is, when your character moved on to the island, they could have brought their own phone. But they didn't, because they wanted to start a new life. That's the games explanation for you leaving everything behind. Also, Are you complaining about a free useful gift? Because that's very rude of you. The next point is nook miles. You mentioned that nook miles mean nothing as a currency. And I have to agree with you there. I have about 100,000 of them and no uses for them at all. But the point of nook miles was not to be a currency. Remember, you're on a deserted island. You're the one making the economy in the first place. The point behind nook miles was to reward you for living your island life, improving this new place that you've been taken to And it can bring some very useful materials. Such as the pocket organization guide. And also, it can be converted into bells, which have more use. So they're not just Tom nook pretending to be nice. He's actually trying to reward you for participating. And that's good of him to do! But that's not the actual point you made. You were worried about the fact that you earned nook miles for changing. Now, this left me confused. I had never earned nook miles for changing. And so I turned to the internet. And found be evidence that this is a thing. If you've got proof, you can interrupt to show it Because I've genuinely never seen this mechanic. But let's assume that you can earn nook miles for changing Now, how does Tom nook calculate your nook miles earning? This... Is a good question. See, AI that can tell what you're doing though camera can't be made with today's technology. Tom nook is not a tech god. And even if he was Where's the camera? Ok, maybe it's the screen But why does it only follow the human? Why can't you see drones over the other residents? And why does it only follow the leader in a one switch island party?
10:31	Indenar Noldo	https://www.polygon.com/animal-crossing-new-horizons-switch-acnh-guide/2020/3/20/21173547/nook-miles-plus-rewards-tasks-daily Unfortunately, the best source I could find is an Interweb article. Should you choose to believe me, the thing you get the Nook Miles for is "Change your outfit using your closet".
10:37	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	I'll read that real quick Well what do you know? It does exist! Thank you. Anyways Now that we've confirmed that it's a thing And that cameras can't be used We can only assume that after every action the protagonist marks that they did it on the app. Perhaps they keep a record to mark it at the end of the day? It's just a simple video game. I don't think this portion was very well explained. My geuss is that you just tell the app after you've done the thing. But if that's true Which it is Then you don't have to worry about videos of you changing getting on the RamenWeb. And even if they did Fully undressing your character shows long underwear covering enough of the body that you don't need to worry about privacy, you're basically wearing clothes. This is true for both genders (sorry ramen). So basically, you're ok there. Alright what's next
10:38	Indenar Noldo	My counter-counter-argument? Is that next?
10:52	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	No I'm not done disproving everything Such as It's unreasonable to blame Tom nook for your lack of control over the text boxes. That's rediculous. Ok. Well. Your next point is about the fact that you're doing all the work. And my counter is... Well Yeah you are. One, you choose to do this job. Ok, you actually didn't But your character did. And when they did that they had to consider the work. And you say that Tom nook does nothing while you do the whole island yourself He gets the construction permits. He actually turns the stuff you bring him into something useful. He also does the planning process and decides what you'll need to get And also he ultimately provides you with the upgrade. That's because Tom nook is trying to turn this island into a place where people can live. And he could do it on his own But having you do it improves the island economy and gives you incentive to work hard And if he did it He wouldn't have enough time to plan, would he? Also he's got other islands to manage You also mentioned that he failed to provide housing to your family. And must I say, What are you expecting out of him? He didn't know they were coming until they turned on the game. Tom nook is a person. He can't just do everything for you. Ok, we're almost done disproving everything. Next is Timmy and Tommy. They're working with nook. He says this at the beginning. He says that they'll just buy whatever off of you and that he's not sure about this business practice. That's probably because Timmy and Tommy had this idea in the first place. Also, Timmy and Tommy might not be children. Saying that they are is a big assumption. And finally... Knowledge. He's not restricting it on purpose. He does basically give you the necessary recipes. I say basically because they cost money and nook miles that he's basically handing you early game. He doesn't have them all. He's still learning DIY himself! And he can't restrict bottles from the ocean. Alright. So with all that I'm ready for your counter counter. I'm going to go use the bathroom while you talk, if that's ok. Be back soon.
10:52	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	THANK YOU MR CAISIUM! NOLDO? CARE TO SPEAK?
10:52	Indenar Noldo	1) I think you misunderstand; I'm not attacking his sense of humor, I just talked about it as a prelude to elaborating on my issues with Nook and his Phone. 2) Ah, while that might be true, NookPhones cannot serve the most basic purpose of a phone: calling people. While there is a "Call Islander" app, this can only be used to summon your friends and family from your native dimension to play together with them. Nevertheless, other people can call YOU. Nook is deliberately not letting you, specifically, call people without telling you beforehand. I call this false advertising and ripping people off. Besides, the quality of the phone doesn't matter to the fact that Nook spies on you in all places at all times. I am complaining about this "free useful gift". While it has some uses and is free, that does not excuse Nook's unwanted stalking. 3) I agree; I now believe that Nook Miles are quite valuable indeed and it would be extremely generous for Nook to hand these digital 5-bells-a-piece currency bits out like candy if it weren't for the fact that he gives you the Miles by spying on you. 4) Yet the idea that the protagonist marks that they did [X thing] on the app is all conjecture. In-game, you do [X thing] and immediately, your phone notifies you that you can get Nook Miles for this! It doesn't claim the Nook Miles automatically, but why else would your phone beep? Your idea isn't nonsensical, but it's just that: an idea. I doubt Nook would post videos of me changing on the RamenWeb. Too many risks and no gain. On the other hand, I do not approve of NOOK watching me changing. And it doesn't matter if I'm naked or if I have three layers on at all times, the privacy breach is the same. Nook is watching me in my house as I do miscellaneous private activities. 5) Text boxes: I can only assume that my character is, for some reason, unwilling to confront Nook about the privacy breach. This could be Nook's fault. This could not be. We don't know, so I'll drop this point. 6) It doesn't matter whether or not I chose to do Nook's work. My argument is that NOOK doesn't do his own work. He does get the construction permits and do the planning process and some managing, as well as finish the upgrade. And yet he is responsible for so much more and he pushes that whole burden onto me instead, and yet no one ever confronts him about his lapse in duty, which is the reason I am suing him: to enact justice on his actions. What's telling is that if you never finish (or accept) your forced job of helping him, he NEVER Does It Himself. He just waits for days...weeks...months...even years, for you to do his job, even when he should have had plenty of time to manage everything else. You also claim that he makes me do this to improve economy and "give...[me] incentive to work hard". He's not some sort of parent to me. I came to his island for a place to live and relax, not a place to work at his beck and call and labor tirelessly to BUILD. CHARACTER. 7) What do I expect from Nook? I expect him to do his job. "He can't just do everything for [me]." He can't, but communicating with his child workers to make sure everyone on the island has a place to live is a BASIC action for someone "who "wants to turn this island into a place where people can live." 8) Fine, I won't divulge Timmy and Tommy's true natures. Instead, I'll drop this argument. 9) I'll give you credit here, he's just trying to learn how to DIY and provide the island with a nice recreational relaxing activity. This tells you where his priorities are. Recreation is important and it's great that he cares, but he's partaking in this hobby at the expense of time he could better spend, oh I don't know, making sure everyone on the island has a home?
1101	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Ok I'm back. Some of the points aren't dead yet. ... But you look oddly... unsatisfied. ..
1101	Indenar Noldo	You can't see me though?
1101	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	How ABOUT we fix that? I'm making a sans fight reference
1102	Indenar Noldo	Yes, you are.
1105	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	1) ok then. 2) yes it can, he calls you. And you never actually have a reason to call anybody. You can just walk to them. The game makes Timmy and Tommy to this because it's the best way to give the notification without forcing you to talk to them. 3) how does he spy on you, exactly? 4) ok sure. It's not a great explanation. But the game doesn't actually explain how it finds when you've done nook miles anyway, and we know it's not cameras. For now let's just say that the phone magically counts what you've done. It's the best idea that works that we have. And also, it's not going stalking you. I will give you that it's not ok for him to watch you do private things. I'm just saying, it could be worse.
1106	Indenar Noldo	Anything more?
1111	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	6) uhh... What are Nook's responsibilities exactly? He's already bringing everything to the island for you and doing the management and planning and working with the construction. That's just what he does. Why would he ever need to do more then that? What more can he possibly be responsible for? 7) Again, Nook's job was never defined in the first place! And how could he possibly have known that they were coming? Nobody gave any warning at all. I'm impressed he could even get the tents. 9) but everyone on the island either has a home or is about to get one. Ok. Counter me
1112	Indenar Noldo	2) Exactly. HE can call you. YOU cannot call HIM. And just because it doesn't seem like there would be any need for you to have to call anyone doesn't excuse Nook's straight-out removing the option to when it's a TELEPHONE. You know, devices whose purpose is to call people? 3) See below. 4) Nook's manually watching you. That was always the idea. 5-2) It could be worse. Just like murdering one Air Nomad is bad but committing Air Nomad Genocide is worse. Just because the action could be worse doesn't make it inexcusable in any regard. 6) Making sure everyone has a home premade for them. This wouldn't be a problem if it wasn't his responsibility, but he explicitly says that he couldn't provide the home because a mix-up. This means that he WAS supposed to do this, but he COULDN'T because of a mistake. In the case of my island, seven different times. There was a so-called "mix-up" SEVEN OUT OF SEVEN TIMES. 7) See above. If his job overworked him, he's the leader of the whole thing, right? He could assigned responsibilities to others. You might think, "But what if he DID and those other people were responsible for the mix-up?" Nook still hired them to do this job and he couldn't manage to fix the issue over seven different occasions! 9) No thanks to him. Like I said, if you just don't play the game for forty years, he STILL hasn't realized that you're not available and that he needs to do it himself. He's done NOTHING.
1120	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	2) I mean, the phone probably can call people. If it can go one way it can go the other. Why would the devs at Nintendo add that feature that is no use anyway? 3) ok 4) BWA HA HA HA HA HA ... Oh, you're serious. So he's watching your every action and notifying the phone the moment you've done the thing? Now how would be possibly do that? 6) you really want him to just cover your island in houses in the blind chance that a human player needs them? It might not even ever be used. Better to just have the player play the 2 hour tutorial. 7) he did assign responsibilities to others. What do you think you're there for? 9) he has other islands to manage, you know. Plus, if the residents aren't going to participate, why give them anything? Also, it's possible he knows about time traveling and doesn't want that power to be overabused. Ok. That should kill a few. Last counter. Then I say we sleep and resume tomorrow.
1121	Indenar Noldo	2) If Nintendo didn't make a call app, there IS no call app. That's how this works, isn't it? 4) Your explanation was "magic". Note that Nook doesn't sleep and we don't know what he doesn't know what he does in his free time. 6) No, I want Timmy and Tommy to communicate with Nook that someone new is coming to the island, and then I want Nook to set up the newcomer's tent. 7) I'm not in his company. I shouldn't have to do work for his company. 9) It's his job. Villagers can't come to the island for forty years because he doesn't think they deserve it because he considers the people already living on his island lazy and unhelpful for not doing his company's bidding. Cool, good night! Note that this is a mutual temporary truce and not a sign of surrender. When's a good time tomorrow?
1122	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Probably 9:30 again Night!
1123	Indenar Noldo	Night!

Transcript of Trial Day 2, June 24, 2020 CE

Time (PM UTC-4)	Speaker	Words
09:31	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	WELL THEN LET'S BEGIN! FIRST, TO RECAP. NOLDO STARTED VERY STRONG WITH LIKE 8 GOOD POINTS. CAISIUM THEN SPENT THE REST OF TRIAL TIME TRYING TO KILL THEM ALL WITH LIMITED SUCCESS. HE ONLY HAS ONE POINT ON THE BOARD RIGHT NOW. AS OPPOSED TO NOLDO'S LIKE 5. NOW BEFORE WE BEGIN, MAY THE PROSECUTION PLEASE GIVE IT'S OPENING STATEMENT. Are we gonna have a statement yet
09:31	Indenar Noldo	I have been called many things. Indenar. Noldo. Douchebag Supreme. Calamity Helium Oof Frank Certainly "Certain; Totally Not Someone You Know" Gabonymous Gannonymous Ganonymous "Gan" Mahogany H-HOGANON GANONHO NOONHAG Onhogan hoongan (Hoganon) Nye the Science Guy GOHANON (GANONHO -->) HANOGON GAHNOON FOENANON ONHONAN Notdadganon lieganon Hanonymous "Han" Grooseonymous Mathematicus Solo. But as much as I loathe the actions of Thomas Nook, I still believe he has the potential to change his ways. Of course, he hasn't done that yet, has he? That's why we're here. Let's do this thang!
09:32	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	NOW FOR THE DEFENCE.
09:32	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Hmmmmm... Judging by your expression, you've lost four points already. But you look oddly.... unsatisfied. How about we make it four more?
09:33	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	NOW FOR QUOTES FROM THE JURY.
09:34	DougDoug	Noldo can prove Nook guilty... If he plays the best god D**n lawyer of his life.
09:35	LEGO Temmie	hOI! I'm LegO TemmIE!!1!
09:35	Desbug	BULBOUS HEAD
09:36	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	Now let's begin with Caisium this time. Any objections?
09:36	Indenar Noldo	None here, that sounds fair.
09:36	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	Ok. Mr. Caisium?
09:39	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Ahem. Before we begin, I'd like a favor of the Prosecution. You still have about 4 points, and in case you can't tell already, I want to debate over those a lot. I don't want to scroll all the way up for them, it's very time consuming. Can you please restate your remaining points? You there
09:40	Indenar Noldo	Yep.
09:42	Mr. NotJohnKirbo	WHILE WE WAIT, LET'S PUT ON SOME MUSIC. Begin playing smooth mcgrooves "heartache"
09:42	Indenar Noldo	Point 2: Nintendo did not create a call app on the NookPhone. Thus, it seems that Nook does not give his Resident Representatives access to calling. Point 4: While the idea of Nook watching you 24/7 seems unlikely, your own explanation was "magic", which I find completely preposterous. Note that Nook doesn't sleep. We don't know what he does when you're not in the same room with him. Point 6: I don't want Nook to cover islands in houses in case a human comes to town. I want Timmy and Tommy to communicate with Nook that someone new is coming to the island, and then I want Nook to set up the newcomer's tent. Point 7: Nook assigns responsibilities to me constantly. I'm not in his company. I shouldn't have to do work for his company. Point 9: Giving villagers homes is part of Nook's job. As time travelers may have noted, villagers are unable to come to the island for forty years because he doesn't think they deserve it because he considers the people already living on his island lazy and unhelpful for not doing his company's bidding.
09:43	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Hmm. Alright. This time we're going to have a different approach, if you're ok with it. Instead of debating every point at once, We'll go one by one.
09:43	Indenar Noldo	Is this Caesium or Mr. NotJohnKirbo speaking?
09:44	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Caisium here. Sound good?
09:44	Indenar Noldo	Cool.
09:50	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Ok. Point 2. The thing about not being able to call. This makes little sense when you consider that everyone else seems to be able to call. In particular I'm referring to Harv. You know, the wedding season guy? He calls you, and he's not even affiliated with nook. Gulliver also uses a NookPhone. He can call his crew. So the question is, why limit you? Well let's look at two things. First, What would you use the van feature for? *call I mean, come on There's no reason to call anybody in this game! Mail even works better! If you can think of any reason for you to want to call someone, then you'd better state it when I turn it over to you. Also, motive. If nook was really running a totalitarian regime With full control over you To enslave you Or whatever your accusing him of Why does he chose to restrict calling? Why would he do that? There's no reason for him to. I want answers to those And I'll be in the BR for a second Counter while I'm gone please Ok. Thanks in advance. All yours, noldo.
09:51	Indenar Noldo	This IS the point. Resident Representatives and human villagers, specifically, have NookPhone models that cannot be used to call people. You're right in saying there may not be any need to call anyone. But that's irrelevant. Nook gives you a NookPHONE. PHONES are, first and foremost, devices used to CALL people. By giving you a specifically downgraded model of a NookPhone that lacks the capabilities of basic telephones, Nook is falsely advertising and purposely putting you down. You are right. Nook doesn't seem to have a motive. I propose that further investigation is done after this case to understand those motives. I can't claim to know or understand his every thought process. But in the end, Nook's motives don't matter to the fact that his actions are wrong in several regards.
09:59	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Sorry I took so long.
09:59	Indenar Noldo	That's fine!
10:01	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	I think you're missing my point about the no need factor. Here's a quote from Ghandi in Civ 6. "there is no shame in detterance. Having a weapon is very different from actually using it." It's the same with the NookPhone. Having the ability to call people is very different then actually doing so.
10:01	Indenar Noldo	NookPhones are nuclear weapons?
10:05	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	No, I just used that as an example. Though if he's convicted, let's look in to that more. The idea behind my no need point is that because you don't have a reason to call anybody you don't call anybody even though you can. See, when you look at your thought process, it's about (sorry for this epic roast) at [THE FALLEN ARBITER] level. Phones can call people - nook gave me a phone - I can't call people in game, even if I don't have to - nook is needlessly restricting my actions As you can see, you made a few mistakes, such as remembering that it's a video game. Made by Nintendo.
10:06	Indenar Noldo	So you're saying that the inability to call others cannot be 100% accurately attributed to Nook or his creator/parent/god Nintendo, as it's unclear which one is responsible for this supreme oversight on someone's part?
10:06	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	This means that there's no reason to give you an option to call anybody because it wouldn't amount to anything as the character doesn't need to.
10:06	Indenar Noldo	I didn't mean to press enter. Please ignore that.
10:09	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Ok And to not ignore that Yeah, I'm saying that the lack of a call people option isn't tied to nook. I'm saying it might not even be Attached to a lack of an ability to do so. So with that in mind, can you counter that
10:10	Indenar Noldo	Assuming this is no longer turn-based, someone is taking away the ability to call people, because you CAN'T call people. If it's Nintendo, that would agree with what you're saying. Perhaps that'll be investigated on a later day.
10:11	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Are you willing to declare this point dead?
10:12	Indenar Noldo	For now. For this conviction.
10:14	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	We'll definably look in to it more later. You know, We might end up better game theorists then [The Fallen Arbiter]. Also off topic I genuinely am surprised that this is as difficult as it is. I thought that I would have won already, and I'm actually not sure how many points I'll be able to kill before I have to make mine. Basically, good job.
10:14	Indenar Noldo	Why thank you! Now what about the next point?
10:17	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Just don't make me use my special attack. Point 4: Tom Nook watching you (Can probably kill this one, not sure about the other two) Ok let's do this. First, we have to remember that this is a Nintendo game. So they're not going to explain how everything works. Magic or not, we have no way of knowing how nook miles are calculated. And there's not enough evidence to find out. So I'm willing to declare stalemate on that one. Sounds fair?
10:18	Indenar Noldo	Fair. We'll probably have to make another study on these two points specifically.
10:21	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Definably. Definitely But you do have another point. We don't actually know what he does with his time. He never sleeps And you suspect he's stalking. But here, we have evidence to debate! Yay! So let's begin. Now, what is Tom Nook's occupation? you're not there, are you even though the icon says you are
10:21	Indenar Noldo	I am.
10:21	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Oh Never mind then
10:21	Indenar Noldo	Nook's occupation.
10:21	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	You know Job Hint:
10:21	Indenar Noldo	I was under the impression that he leads Nook Inc. Shall we find the evidence?
10:21	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	CEO Yeah. CEO of Nook Inc.
10:22	Indenar Noldo	Founder and president of Nook Inc. If only we knew more about the Animal Crossing lore.
10:22	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	CEO's have entire companies to manage. Ok fine, president.
10:22	Indenar Noldo	I wouldn't rule out CEO.
10:24	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Well, as president of the company, he has a hard job. Double fine, CEO. He's got to manage all the sales for his natural goods, He's got to manage his islands All of them, and he suggests that there's a lot So probably why he delagates to you But that's for another point. Right now we're looking at what he does when you don't play. And we don't know.
10:25	Indenar Noldo	Nook has the ability to be in more than one place at once. In fact, this alone could point to him even having the powers of a god.
10:25	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	It's theoretically possible that every second you're not in the game he's sitting in his backroom with some horrifying alcahol/drug mixture watching RamenWeb for hours.
10:25	Indenar Noldo	Not necessarily though, let's not jump to conclusions. True, but we have no evidence for this.
10:27	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Exactly m All we know is that he has a lot on his plate. So I think it's more reasonable to assume that while you're not playing he's doing other work and recreation such as sleeping. It just makes a lot of sense. But I know what you're planning to counter with.
10:28	Indenar Noldo	Actually, it's mysterious what he's done not just when you're not playing, but when he's not in your sight.
10:28	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	If you keep the game on for a long period of time, Tom Nook stays on your island.
10:28	Indenar Noldo	The variable is that you're either playing or you're not.
10:29	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Yes. So here's my theory about that.
10:30	Indenar Noldo	We actually know: Nook is on several islands simultaneously at any given point in time, as long as two people are playing Animal Crossing at the same time. Because Animal Crossing takes place in real time. Unless Dodo Airlines is extradimensional travel and every island is a different dimension. Which...would explain why they always burn the flight patterns to remote islands. We'll investigate this some other time, though.
10:30	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	Actually, I think you're on to something.
10:30	Indenar Noldo	Oh?
10:33	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	It might actually be why you can't call anyone. You're in a pocket dimension. And the reason Nook hired flightless birds isn't a cruel joke. Because they can hop between dimensions. But even so, He's still got to do the work. And so I think that's why he's on his computer all the time when you're in the town hall. And why does he stay up? Because you can't progress in the game without him. You need him. And he is making a PERSONAL SACRIFICE because he CARES ABOUT YOU. Honesty, I think this point is long dead. Now the real question is do you agree...
10:34	Indenar Noldo	While what you said is somewhat to very reasonable...we can't be sure about his motives. We don't know why he sacrifices so much for these mysterious deserted islands. Perhaps he cares about you. Perhaps he wishes to become a multiverse god. We can't know for sure.
10:35	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	That's true. There's so much unknown here. You know what, frick it. I say stalemate. Either way the results are the same.
10:36	Truthfully, convicting Nook isn't exactly what I want. I just want to be able to understand him better, and if signs point to him being a good person, I'll accept that. And you're right. We DON'T know enough Nook to reach any conclusion. Not yet. * "enough about Nook"
10:38	Defragon Peroxus Caesium	So do you agree?
10:38	Indenar Noldo	Stalemate does seem to be the most reasonable outcome of all this.